I’ve Been Rejected.

I recently received this message in my campus mailbox:

Re:  Your application to Job Opening # 42326

Posting Title : Met Eng Rotational Program

Dear Erin Gancer,

We enjoyed the opportunity to interview you and wish to thank you for your interest
in Caterpillar Inc.

We regret to inform you that we are not able to offer employment at this time.  We
wish you finding success in suitable employment.

Any personal information you have provided will be governed by Caterpillar’s Data
Privacy Policy.  If you have any questions, you can view the policy in its entirety
at www.JoinTeamCaterpillar.com.

Caterpillar Inc.

I’ve been rejected. 

Now, I finished my degree in 2006, and I’ve been gainfully employed for quite some time now, so this “Dear Engineer” letter didn’t sting too badly.  (read: I laughed out loud.)  But it made me think, “How do I respond to rejection?” 

I don’t like it.  (Does anyone?)  I’ll normally run from it.  That probably means I have some fear of it.  I’m familliar with it as an adolescent.  I’m not used to it as an adult.  Hrm..  Does my fear of rejection impact my life positively or negatively?…does it make me a better worker, or a scared worker?  Who can reject me?  Who can’t? 

Now some Truth: God hasn’t rejected me, but adopted me as his child.  He’s told me ahead of time that the world won’t be fair, and that it won’t accept me if I set myself apart for Him.  He’s also promised to be with me as I fulfill the purposes he has for me.  Even if everyone else brushes me off, He NEVER will.  That’s good.

Father, what do I need to change in my thinking and my actions so that I can better understand your perspective on worldly rejection?

Psalm 24: A Psalm of David

the question, “Who is this King of glory?” kept coming to mind this morning…

The earth is the LORD’s, and everything in it, 
     the world, and all who live in it;

 for he founded it upon the seas 
     and established it upon the waters.

 Who may ascend the hill of the LORD ? 
     Who may stand in his holy place?

 He who has clean hands and a pure heart, 
     who does not lift up his soul to an idol 
     or swear by what is false.

 He will receive blessing from the LORD 
     and vindication from God his Savior.

 Such is the generation of those who seek him, 
     who seek your face, O God of Jacob.
     Selah

 Lift up your heads, O you gates; 
     be lifted up, you ancient doors, 
     that the King of glory may come in.

 Who is this King of glory? 
     The LORD strong and mighty, 
     the LORD mighty in battle.

 Lift up your heads, O you gates; 
     lift them up, you ancient doors, 
     that the King of glory may come in.

 Who is he, this King of glory? 
     The LORD Almighty— 
     he is the King of glory. 
     Selah

this needs to be stored in my heart and memory.  does anyone have a favorite translation to suggest for memorizing this psalm?

Room With a View

For those who follow me on Twitter, Facebook, or are just generally around me, this announcement will come as no suprise to you.  However, I am just too overwhelmed not to jot something on here about this moment.  If I travel no further up the engineering food chain than this, I will be satisfied. 

 

I have a window.

 

[ I would take a picture to show you, however cameras aren't allowed on company property, and so taking a picture would be acknowledging that I do carry my personal cell with a camera where I shouldn't.  So, use your imagination.  Sunlight.  Parking lot.  Trees. People....ahhh. ]

I’m not trying to brag, but only to share my good news with you all, that I’ve been blessed with sunlight today, and for at least the next 5.5 months. 

Oh wait..that sure sounds funny.  Hmm…let’s see.  I’m blessed with sunlight every day – I have windows in my house, and I usually get outside at least once.  You’d think I would be giddy like this every day of my life.  Why, oh why, is today so special? 

It is amazing the kind of clarity a little change in perspecitve can bring.  All of a sudden you’re so thankful for things that you had taken for granted only hours earlier.  The sunlight was no different from the moment I walked into my building until the moment I sat at my new desk.  I was.

How can we mentally change perspectives every day to be more thankful? ..to notice the things, or the people, that we walk by every day without another thought?

From lunch

Sin has many manifiestations, but its essence is one.  A moral being, created to worship before the throne of God sits on the throne of his own selfhood and from that elevated position declares, “I AM.”

-A.W. Tozer

Read this at lunchtime today..and now I fear there is something I must do about it.  How about you?

 

my ride home

drizzle and dim streetlamps
make me look over my shoulder as unlock my door
fleeing the unsettling quiet of a city night

crosswalks invisible to the naked eye
are filled with people unwilling to yield

so i do
and laugh

the 300 C comes along side at a stop light
eyes forward, erin
green and he’s gone
left in front of me from the right lane

into an alley

i’m watching a drug deal as i drive by

nervous laughter
reminding me where i live

now out of the car and into unknown
keys in hand
feet in puddles
stray on porch
woman in house

drizzle and dim porchlights
make me look out the window as i lock my door
fleeing the unsettling quiet of a city night

thoughts on love.

I’ve been given the opportunity to share about the fruit of the Spirit, LOVE, today on my Pastor’s blog.  No pressure, eh?  Well, I have so many thoughts on love….here are a few more random ones:

God gives us the ability to love like Him..we don’t have the ability within ourselves.

If we gave God free reign in our lives, we’d be a lot more loving.

Love is action.

God is Love.

^——– This short circuits my mind.

And He can be no other way.  Attributes of God are only human terms to try and explain what He is like, but He is not fragmented the way we are.  We can be kind in one moment, and jealous in another, and angry in another.  He is loving, jealous, just…etc. all in one.  There is no separation between His attributes as there are with ours.  He is God.  God is just, loving, faithful, merciful, forgiving, righteous…  He is God.

Yeah, all that is swirling around in my brain.

Any thoughts on love you need to get out?